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Anderson Cooper Ridiculist: Self-Tweeting as good as SEX

Harvard researchers have been at it again, answering the questions that nag at our collective psyche.
The most recent discovery proves that tweeting about oneself is every bit as satisfying as eating, getting money and having sex! I assume they mean that it beats any one of the three, but not all of them together, as is sometimes the case. While it sounds boring – to writer and reader alike; if this is true – it’s less messy than two of the activities, and a great deal less strenuous and time-consuming than the other. I don’t Tweet, don’t ask me. Am I missing out?