The Interview

The personnel officer at Houston Widget sits in his office taking a quick overview of the two resumes in front of him. In the back of his mind he knows that one day he may have to call the individual he hires today to fire tomorrow. He buzzes his secretary and asks her to send in Mr. Morton. The applicant enters and is offered a seat. The interviewer notices he is well dressed with a small NRA pin on his lapel. The interview begins.

“Mr. Morton, are you level five in Perl?” When Mr. Morton answers yes he is handed a small card of Perl code and asked if he can find the error.

“Object equals is parsed incorrectly.” He instantly replies.

“So Mr. Morton, what are your hobbies, what do you do for fun?” The interviewer asks.

“Guns.” He replies.

“Guns how? What do you do with guns?”

“Well, everyone needs a hobby that’s for sure. What does your family think about your hobby?”

“I am single, don’t much care for children. With all the guns you see.”

“How many guns to you have Mr. Morton?”

“Well let me see… There are the two 9mms, the .45, the Mach 10, the M16, and a few collector items. I also have a concealed carry permit and I have applied for an automatic weapon license.”

“I spend most weekends and a few evenings a week at the range. And am on call to go down to Laredo next month with some friends to patrol the border.” Mr. Morton answers.

“Well thank you Mr. Morton we will be giving you a call.

The next applicant enters and sits. The interviewer notices he is well dressed with a small Smiley Face pin on his lapel. The interview begins.

“Mr. Jite, are you level five in Perl?” When Mr. Jite answers yes he is handed a small card of Perl code and asked if he can find the error.

“Object equals is parsed incorrectly.” He instantly replies.

The interviewer tells Mr. Jite that the he is going to forgo the meat of the interview and zip right to the end.

“So Mr. Jite, what are your hobbies?”

“I grow tomatoes!” He replies.

“Tomatoes? You eat a lot of tomatoes do you?”

“I meant growing them, I am the Tomato King of Seabrook Texas, I even do an article on occasion for our community newspaper.”

“Any other hobbies?” The interviewer goes on.

“The wife and kids and I enjoy canoeing and camping on weekends, they are not much into tomatoes.”

“Well thank you Mr. Jite we will be giving you a call."

Who ya gonna call?