Another medical study demonstrates benefits of RedWine pharmaceutical

A new medical study by John Hopkin of Baltimore (I-83 underpass at 43rd) confirms nearly 2000 years of ad hoc research that RedWine can make you feel better. Mr. Hopkin performed 365 trials until double-blind, in an unsubsidized privately funded test.

The main component of Redwine, CH3-CH2-OH or known more commonly on the street as C2H5OH, is the chemical formulation of ethyl alcohol. The exact mechanism of RedWine is unknown; government officials at the FDA are closely monitoring it day and night.

Users of RedWine should avoid driving until they know how Redwine affects their central nervous system. Allergic reactions to Redwine have been reported in women who suddenly get hot flashes which are only treated by the total removal of all clothing.

Redwine is contraindicated for older men with chronic liver disease - simple blood tests of 0.20 BAC can determine whether RedWine is working. Patients should avoid drinking alcohol with their Redwine, as this can increase the effect of your dosage.

A typical dose is 5 oz for women, 16 ounces for men, and 0.75 liters for those patients who have developed a tolerance for RedWine. Common side effects include temporary blurred vision and slurred speech. Headaches have been reported the next morning.

You can find Redwine at CVS and Walgreens -- the one stop pharmacies for all your healthcare needs -- between the ice cream freezer and their tobacco counter. Ask your prescriber whether RedWine may be right for you.