KicK! Making Politics Fun

There are endless examples of Rush Limbaugh opening up the darkness inherent in the conservative heart for all to see. His rise to syndication was due to the notoriety he gained in Sacramento where he would read off the names of men who died of AIDS and hit the applause button. There is the giddy joy he took in the deaths of Curt Cobain, Jerry Garcia, and Christopher Reeves to name a few, and of course his coup de grace, calling 13 year old Chelsea Clinton a dog. Now it is making fun of someone with a horrible disease without apology because he doesn't like their politics. Bubba is Limbaugh's top dittohead.

“I mean really Bubba, how can you listen to that disgusting sack of shit? He represents all that is horrid in the human condition! There isn’t one good thing to say about him! "

“He says what needs to be said which no one else is saying!”

“Are you out of your mind? No one else is saying!  Well, besides The President, the Vice President, the entire Bush Administration, the Well of both the Houses of Congress, most of the Supreme Court, almost the entire bandwidth of the AM Dial, the top news network Fox News, the top daily newspaper The Wall Street Journal, and from most churches for Christsake!"

“Don’t have a stroke there Rack! Burns your butt doesn’t it? And that’s the point, anything that burns a liberals' butt is a good thing!”

“The abject hypocrisy of the man’s character doesn’t bother you? A chickenhawk supporter of the war in Vietnam who refused to go himself. A morphine addict who promotes jail for morphine addicts other than himself. No children, three divorces, no church, gets caught with Viagra returning from a weekend at a Caribbean sex playground and then touts himself as Americas' spokesman for Family Values!  A garden slug beats Limbaugh in the character department!"

“Calm down Rack! Look at yourself! You see why our harmless fluffball is so loved by so many?  I bet he causes strokes and coronaries in a couple liberals everyday, which is a good thing. Rush is good for America!”

“So all you want in this world is to see liberals die?”

“No, what I want is my taxes to go down, and if it takes a few liberals moving six feet under, it’s a fair and necessary trade off.”

“And you have no problem sleeping at night?”

“Like a baby.”

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As Bubba and I finished watching the Texas Gubernatorial debate, he recanted on his recent promise to pull a straight Democratic ticket come election day.

 Kinky Freidman had won him over,  running as an Independent, Bubba will have to push each lever separately.

Quite a complicated process for a redneck who has been pulling straight Republican tickets for most of 40 years. 

“But Bubba, Kinky didn’t do anything but suck on a wet cigar and issue forth Texas homilies. In fact he reminded me of Dick Armey for Christsake! The only thing we know for sure is about him is that he wants to fund the state by putting video poker bars in front of every trailer park in Texas. And if I understood correctly, he wants to make cats citizens?”

“So the great tolerant Jite is a cat racist now? The bottom line you liberals just don’t get is why I should pay for your kids’ educations. I don’t have kids, let’s put the bill on those who choose to gamble, that is far more fair.”

This is the territory where we always bog down, his ideology so outweighs reason that there is often little point in further discourse. But one must always try.

“Bubba! They did this same video poker thing in Mississippi,  the results were that the haves got a free ride they didn’t need while the have-nots ended up with the repo-man in their driveway and banker foreclosing their homes more than any time since the Depression.”

“Not my problem! You blather on and on about choice, they have a choice not to gamble!”

Once again I tried explaining progressive taxation to Bubba’s deaf ear, that the grand swath of Americans live on a teetering economic fault line. The middle class has no savings to speak of, they are in credit card debt up to their eyeballs, tuitions and energy bills are rising, as are the ever persistent emergency what-have-yous. 

The working poor are hit even harder through reduction in every phase of financial help. All to allow the wealthy another vacation home and/or stock options. Meanwhile,  the economic hardship you don’t care they suffer, is what causes so many to give up and fall into drug and alcohol addiction, crime, guns and violence.

“But its not FAIR!” Bubba shouted.

“Fair? You are invoking fairness now? Gosh Bubba, every time I mention fairness you tell me I am a communist.

Fair? Okay let’s be fair, every radio station who airs three hours of Rush must now air three hours of me!

Or to be fair, Kim Il in North Korea should have 8765 nuclear weapons with ICBMs to deliver them. Parity is fairness.”

“Its not about evil empires, queers, women, Mexicans or blacks. The real unfairness in this country is my tax bill, that’s the only place fairness is required.”

“So everything, the entire ball of wax, is about your tax bill?”

“Yep. That, and keeping Yankee socialist crap out of my neighborhood, out of Texas, and out of my country.”

Well, what can one say other than the same conversation goes on twice a minute on every street in America, dead ends. Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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NYT - Washington Bureau - December, 2013
The overturn of Roe vs. Wade had an immediate impact upon the nation. The Southern states used the judgment to not only outlaw abortion, but to force religion into every facet of public life. As Congress and the Supreme Court handed down case after case giving the States back the rights they had lost in the first Civil War, a coalition formed calling themselves the Southern Christian Unity of Man. As the direction and reality of the SCUM hit home, millions of young women soon began moving North, leaving many of the remaining males even more sexually frustrated than they had previously been. Frustration led to bitterness, and before long religious intolerance ushered in a new era of old prejudices. Soon the women leaving were followed by gays, liberals, Jews, Blacks, and Hispanics and finally even all the bunnies and squirrels had absconded North. It was not a one way street of course, many small organizations from all over the North and West moved South; the various militias, the Heritage Foundation, the Aryan Nations, the Young Republicans, the Skinheads and the EIB Network. The Southern Unity soon seceded from the Union behind what became known around the world as The Line of Reason.

After most of the women and liberals had left and all the homosexuals, Jews (except David Horowitz, Jackie Mason and Kinky Friedman) and all the Blacks (except Clarence Thomas, Ward Connerly, Armstrong Williams, Alan Keyes, Ken Hamblin and OJ Simpson who were too busy topping off the mint juleps of those living in the big house), a wall was erected to keep what few women remained as breeding stock. Soon only intolerance, racism, bigotry, hate and kudzu dominated the landscape. The Southern Unity aligned with the theocracies of the Middle East, while the North moved closer to the notion of liberal democracy practiced in Western Europe. The die was cast and war was in the wind.

Our second Civil War ended more radically than the first. The wall served the North as a ready made blockade allowing them to ignore the SCUM, and with United Nations sanctions it became apparent to all that the Unity had to either break out and attack or starve. The dichotomy of values between the two nations was so overwhelming that dialogue was not even possible. So much so that the cry from the first Civil War of “Kill the Nwords and capture the Yankees!” was changed to “Kill the Nwords, Spics, Fags, Liberals and capture the Women!” As The SCUM took that cry literally, surrender became an impossible option for either side.

The outcome was sure and swift. Once again an army of dedicated racist bigots with personal weapons bought at gun shows were no match for the hardware, population and armies of the North. After they lost the war, Unity members who did not commit suicide emigrated to Palestine where they are still awaiting word on recognition for a White Christian Homeland.

Here in America the subsequent de-population coupled with an immediate 50 point surge in average I.Q scores, created such a good government and economy that abortions have became rare. The lesson learned is a two edged sword. Those whose political values are based upon intolerance, bigotry and hate are better served by dispersing themselves throughout the population while the rest of us are best served by letting them amass in geographical congregation and then just allow the conflict between good and evil to run its historic predetermined course. Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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I had myself one good yuck a few minutes ago. I surfed over to the Modern Library where they have the list of the best 100 books written in English. I need a new book, sadly for the fifth time now,  I couldn’t get past page 14 of ULYSSES. That is number one you know.  First person Irish ranting and raving!  I get enough of that around here so it seems rather dull to me.

Modern Library top 100 list  There are two lists side by side, the Board List and the Reader List. Six of the top ten on the Reader List are by L. Ron Hubbard or Ayn Rand. Seems the Modern Library had a Scientologist and Freeper invasion of late. But you know, that's what I like about the net, goofnuts having their say.

Lobby for Net Neutrality.

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Just got a call from Bubba, he said he had something important to tell me, a nice surprise he added. It was my turn to go to his house which wasn’t far and in the same general white area I reside in. He had the garage door open and was drinking a beer knocking balls around on the pool table.

 “What news?” I asked grabbing a cue and a beer.

 “I’m pulling the straight Democratic lever on the Seventh, thought you would enjoy that. As a prize for me, I don’t expect to hear anything even hinting at an itoldyouso.”

 “I told you so!” I gave him what he expected, “I knew after 25 years of dogging you, you would come around!”

 He pulled back from the table and leaned on his stick in that Bubba Stance. “It has nothing to do with your mindless liberal drool Rack, the Republicans have too much power, it has corrupted them and I am sick of having The Okras in charge.”

 Okra was Bubba’s Sister-in-law, a Born again, Evangelical, Fundamentalist, Pentecostal member of the Religious Right with a perfect voting record. We had both taken to calling all such people Okras. Bubba had a troubled relationship with Okra in that he just didn’t like her. But they voted the same ticket every November, so he was beholding to her.

 He leaned forward on his cue to make me understand.

 “I have not changed one lick! I don’t want the government stealing my money, people should stay with their own kind, a kick in the head is better than a handout and liberals make me sick.”

 After congratulating Bubba on his fine speech which covered all four conservative values: Selfishness, racism, violence and hatred, I had to ask.

 “San Francisco Pelosi as Speaker? Ways and Means going to a Black guy from Harlem? Judicial Chair to a Black guy from Detroit? Possible Impeachment proceedings? Gosh Bubba have you really thought this through properly?”

 Bubba went into silent cowboy mode causing me to back off for the time being. We had too many more beers and as I got in my car I shouted toward the garage.

 “You want me to contact Jesse Jackson’s Rainbow Coalition and sign you and your Bigaburban up to cart people from the 3rd Ward to the polls?”

 Needless to say… 

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The Abramoff Affair in itself is not much of an issue; Jack Abbamoff, Michael Scanlon and Ralph Reed were just a trio of get rich quick lobbyist crooks. The importance was that the investigation into the Indian Casino scam opened up the door  on how these Right-wing lunatics took over America and held it for 12 long years.

Unlike Barry Goldwater rallying conservatives in the 1960’s with an intellectual look and book, Ronald Reagan used simplistic sound bites and emotional blather so well that the ideological Right sucked it up so intensely they drove themselves into a rabid war stance, a stance to create a one party system in America in perpetuity.

In 1993, three of these little known Reagan activists; Jack Abramoff, Grover Norquist and Ralph Reed took to the streets organizing loud angry ideological protests. They were so young and so angry and so mean they made the peace activists of the late 60's seem sleepy. All were also students of the Newt Gringrich school of offensive offense. They whipped up their constituents with rhetoric they literally screamed from blow horns, microphones and obnoxious signs. Total War Against the Left!  Destroy the Marxist Democrats! Taxation is Theft! Take no Prisoners! Liberal Communist Atheists! Run Them Back to Red China! Liberal Democrate Socialists! Destroy Them by Any Means! All as loud and as horribly obnoxious as it gets, brownshirts with red ties. 

On the first Tuesday of November 1994 with the Gingrich Revolution becoming reality rather than just a study in bomb throwing, these three young men were instantly catapulted to the top of the ideological heap in Washington. When Gingrich became Speaker his first act was to change the process of seniority chairmanships from time spent and gravitas earned, to a system of his personal appointments of only the most hardcore Right-wing ideologues who would do his bidding without question.

Radical Dick Armey from Texas was Majority leader, and the most extreme Right-wing lunatic in Congress, Tom DeLay became Majority Whip, who quickly earned the nickname The Hammer. for his ability to pound out massive dollars from corporations for conservative causes and canditates. For the sake of brevity, I have to leave Newt and Dick for another day to get to the meat of this matter.

Go to Part III... 

 

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The day the Gingrich Revolution began, Tom Delay let it be known that if the lobbyists on K Street wanted the ear of the House of Representatives they would have to pay dearly for it. They were required to cease donations to Democrats and to hence forth hire their lobbyists (for six and seven figure salaries) only from DeLay’s approved list of radical conservative friends and allies. They were also expected to funnel millions into DeLay’s long list of conservative non-profits and PACS who were his ideological friends. Tom DeLay took control of corporate money to subsidize their plan for a one party thousand year Reich. 

Under the swing of The Hammer, corporations and Right-wing issue groups found their costly and often illegal contributions well spent, for it was also DeLay’s job to schedule votes on all bills in the House. Any bill not fitting into the wrapper of who paid him and his cronies was tabled to never see the light of day. There are instances of this going to such extremes that bills almost unanimously passed by the Senate disappeared in the House.

About the only group who paid their millions in bribes to DeLay and his friends and ended up with doodleysquat were the Indian Casinos. Abramoff, Scanlon and Reed ripped the Indians off for millions (while calling them racist names behind their backs) and splitting the money between themselves and DeLay’s PACS. If it were not for that greed gone so over the top that they were raking in millions in personal profit while doing just the opposite for the Casinos as they said they would, we would not know any of this. Tom DeLay would still be Majority Leader and they would still own America. The Wounded Knee of the GOP. 

A name is pretty much missing in all this, but I have saved the worst for last. Grover Norquist can often often be seen as a talking head on television talk shows. Always promoting the elimination of the IRS and all forms of progressive taxation removing the cost of government from the wealthy and placing it on the middle class who pays it and the lower class who suffer less help and benefits. It is Norquist, who every Wednesday morning in Washington since the Gingrich Revolution began, sat at the head of a long table filled with a rotating gang of the heaviest right-wing hitters in America, planning and implementing this entire scam to usurp the democratic process through election and legislative bribery.

Abramoff and Scanlon pleaded guilty and are on their way to jail. With this all hitting the fan in the middle of Ralph Reed’s primary bid for Lieutenant Governor of Georgia, it not only cost him that election, but his Christian hypocrisy destroyed his credibility to the extent he has been put out to pasture. Tom DeLay lost his job as Majority Leader, was then kicked out of Congress and is now facing felony charges in Texas and in Washington. Both of these guys have a special place in Hell reserved for putting on their disgusting crap on the back of Jesus Christ no less.

The kicker is that the man who organized and implemented the plan, who kept it all going with his weekly meetings with conservative PACS and think tanks to squeeze all of corporate America into the fold, is still standing. Grover needs the lid of that garbage can he lives in to come crashing down on his head, and a large rock put on top so he never gets out of all the stink he created.

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I invited Bubba over for a beer to watch the hummingbirds on my new jungle patio. So jungle it is, that I often find myself breaking out in high pitched jungle noises to add to the ambience. After we had downed more than a few beers watching their shenanigans, we remaned them “Little Bastards” watching them zip around the feeder I had hanging over the table. I brought up the news of the day which poor Bubba just didn’t want to hear.

"So Bubba, what’s all this business about Congressman Mark Foley down in Florida? Seems to have become a major political blunder for you and your people."

Bubba was slow to answer. He was utilizing his cowboy way even though he was well aware that I knew that the reason cowboys were slow to speak was because cowboys were slow to think. He set himself upon watching the one hummingbird that hung between us about a foot from our faces.

“Not much there to eat after plucking and gutting that one.” Bubba said ignoring my question. I happened to be thinking along the very same lines having learned too much about the Little Bastards of late. I knew that though the hovering nit of a bird seemed personally interested in us as individuals, it wasn't. Out mutual insight was immediately validated when it zipped up to the feeder where an a member of the axis of evil had arrived. It tried to impale the interloper through the heart with its narrow rapier beak. Bubba told me he had actually witnessed such a murder when he was a boy.

“Foley! Mark Foley Bubba! They want the Speaker of the House to resign a month before the election! Hello in there."

Lucky for Bubba a major helicopter war broke out in our faces to moot my question. More than half a dozen of the Little Bastards were now in awe and destruction mode. The different pitches of the humming was a exciting! After a fast and furious minute which had us bobbing and weaving because we didn't want to have an eye put out, our nit of a friend won hover territory over the feeder while the rest sat in the nearby Mimosa tree contemplating their upcoming revenge, which they seemed to forget as they began fighting among themselves for perch space.

“Bubba! Talk to me! Mark Foley! Resigning Speaker! Democrats win the House!” I was doing my best not to overgloat.

“Damn Queers!” Bubba finally replied.

"Well there you have it. And you know, listening to the right-wing talking dufuses on TV wanting the heads of their very own on a platter over this, Bubba had indeed managed to get the whole conservataive ball of wax down to two words. At least Bubba is good at something.

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CBS has removed Limbaugh's Free Speech segment from Youtube. If you would like to see it, it is within my Pigistory Video present on the website.

Katy Couric began her first week as anchor for CBS EVENING NEWS bringing Rush Limbaugh to her Free Speech segment. If you watching a flatulent addict makes calling you names makes you ill, I can recap it for you in just a few words. Those who are full square behind this Republican Administration’s use of torture and war are good patriotic Americans, while Democrats who speak of discourse and diplomacy are evil unpatriotic Americans.

YouTube of Maher on O'Reilly Bill Maher recently said he was denied his spot on the CBS Free Speech segment because he was going to speak out against religion, which CBS denies. There seems to be some semantic games being played in all this which I am not too clear on. The video not only covers this well, but the dynamics between the two is fun to watch. How people can stomach that guy is just beyond me. His head is so big, he could paint GOODYEAR up each side of it and take the going rate. In the video Maher explains what he wants to say on CBS regards religion: “It is a mass psychosis” responsible for most of the bigotry, intolerance and murder in the world. Whatever the game being played by CBS or perhaps Maher in this, the bottom line is Maher has not been on that segment though he was scheduled for it. As serendipity would have it, right in the middle of this brouhaha, the most volatile segment yet aired appeared, which may force CBS to give Maher his minute.

Site with Nitwit on CBS The night of the Amish school shooting, Katy Couric gave the segment to the father of a Columbine murder victim, Brian Rohrbough. I found this the most disgusting display of a network news program pandering to the extreme religious right than I can recall. If you don’t wish to take the time to watch it, again I can recap for you in just a few words. The Amish shooting - as are all such shootings - are because we teach evolution in our schools and we murder babies. It is not about mental health, the NRA or vengeance gone wild, rather it is all because we are not putting enough Taliban in our soup.

Sacred Cows It is still to be seen whether Maher is allowed to slam religion in a slot with tens of millions of viewers, personally I doubt it will happen unless he changes his words. Are you surprised that there is an article on this very thing on this website?> One bright event regarding this latest gunloon massacre in Pennsylvania was that immediately after the fact, the Amish community reached out to the family of the attacker. An example of how religion should mold us rather than how it has molded us into the most violent Christian industrialized nation on Earth.

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Is Conservatism Genetic? Many years ago when this was all in a print newsletter called The Journal of Hard Response, I put my tongue in cheek and wrote a piece linked above. The other day I happened upon several articles that cited studies which gave that old article some degree of gravitas. Of the many such articles and studies I found, I leave you with these two.

Genetic Ideology The genetic disposition of political ideology.

Genetic Faith  And secondly, the hereditary basis of religious faith.

What news! When it is said that conservative ideology is inherently selfish, callous, bigoted and intolerant of the other, it has now come to be literally true. With that said, as you follow the escapades of my friend Bubba, please do your best to give him a break, for Bubba just can’t help being Bubba. Immutable cause. 

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