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Ben Stein, Expelled and Santa Claus

ben stein expelledWith the success of the movie Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed, the charismatic conservative intellectual Ben Stein – who wrote and narrated the movie – is already at work on his next project, Existing: Santa Claus Angel of the North.

The central position of Expelled is based upon Dr. Richard Sternberg being expelled from the Smithsonian’s National Museum of Natural History for promoting Intelligent Design. That he lost his job because of atheism, scientific fascism and denying him his 1st Amendment rights of freedom of religion and speech. It so happens that Dr. Steinberg was not an employee of the museum at all, but an unpaid research associate who had completed his three-year term. So to put it kindly, the premise of the movie is based upon an almost bigger pile of crap than Creation Science itself.

When asked about his movie being based upon such a profound lie, Stein replied, "Our audience for this movie is not concerned with such small matters, they are concerned with biggest matter of all, God."

Asked if his new movie would use the same symbolism and imagery relating Darwinism and Evolution to Hitler, Nazism, Communism, Fascism and the Holocaust Stein said, "We will do our best but right now we are working mostly upon relating these Godless Clausophobes to the Manson Family and the Eskimo Genocide. You know, what Liberalism accomplishes."

When questioned about any problems proving the existence of a 500 year old obese man living with elves at the North Pole, with a flying sled pulled by reindeer with light up noses and the ability to visit every home in the world in one 14 hour period, Stein smugly replied, "Excuse me, our polls show 100% of 2nd, 3rd and 4th Graders understand the reality of Santa Claus, and 100% of their parents tell them he is real. And let me tell you pal, you can’t go wrong with 100% in the polls!"

Intelligent Design For Dummies