Bizarre News

One of Moorestown New Jersey's finest, Robert Melia has been cleared on all counts, despite the video images he and his girlfriend Heather Lewis had taken of his acts with baby calves, leaving one to wonder about Judge Morely's chain of thought which led to a dismissal."I'm not saying it's OK," Morely said. "This is a legal question for me. It's not a questions of morals. It's not a question of hygiene. It's not a question of how people should conduct themselves." Say whaaa?

I hope a judge with less nebulous thought processes is weilding the gavel when Melia and Heather Lewis face much higher stakes. This time it will not involve barnyard animals,but three girls whom Lewis and Melia had...shall we say a most inappropriate relationship with for five years!

If Judge Morely is adjudicating this one, he may well say the pair "mentored" the girls. Details to be found in link. NJ Policeman Robert Melia free to love baby calves in the wrong way...again
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The jig is up. Olbermann is in a fascist, progressive,commie building, Glenn Beck said so! Keith visits each of Beck's bizarre claims. In fact, Beck starts with the artwork on Rockefeller Center and other buildings and art New Yorkers have seen daily for decades. Only he sees the symbols of the Obama world order to come. He wends his twisted way until he is back at President Obama's planned Tuesday address to school children - just as it was predicted by the symbols! It's all "Hidden in plain sight" people!

In retort, Keith finds equal symbolism in the Fox building where in one example, an "ancient Cretin pictograph" predicted O'Reilly, but there is no Glenn Beck to be found! Watch the myriad twists, turns, revelations and final conclusions which of course, I cannot reveal. Let us just say it would be wise for Beck to avoid any long space voyages! Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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CQ Politics.com's Craig Crawford discusses Levi Johnston's article in the October issue of Vanity Fair. Of course, Johnston was asked about life with the real Sarah Palin, and her home life in Wasilla. Johnston reveals things which will be surprising to those who bought into her carefully constructed image. I'm only revealing a very few here, Keith's video will be a call to arms for Palin devotees, a justification that we were right, for the rest of us.

When spotting a contradiction, good ol' boys have been known to say "that dog don't hunt." In Palin's case, she doesn't fish either, unless some confused amphibian sloshed into her over-sized waders during her photo-ops. For the icon of a young Alaskan pioneer who raises a large family, drops wolves from a helicopter, and governs the state of Alaska as a tireless public servant, it didn't seem far fetched that she could field dress a moose, as she bragged. It turns out that to her that may well mean putting a black bow tie and a boutonnière on one.

Levi tells one story which may well cool her passionate relationship with the NRA, for whom she'd become a virtual poster sweetheart! When they learn the untouched contents of the box under her bed, and the clueless question she asked Levi, their ardor may well cool, as will their cash.

Levi tells of life in the uncommunicative house, which sounds anything but nurturing in any way. In fact, he says that she's lazy, domineering, and uses guilt trips and bribery to get her way. Of course this is his side of the story. However, the statement rings true when you consider the machinations she put the two teens through when an unplanned teen pregnancy threatened her image.

Imagine John McCain as the election neared, and Palin wasn't shy about stating her conviction that voters were turning out only for her! Equally astounding was her decision to drop her office afterward. It's no mystery however. She told the family exactly why - "I just want to take this money and quit being governor." She has plans, oh yes. They all pay better than being a governor too! Believe it or not, there is a lot more Wasilliness to be seen, in Worst!  Samantha Bee reports as Palin steps down as governor and mother
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Is it possible that America Gets Dick for eight more years? Desperate times call for deplorable men! With 2012 looming, and a dry field of Republican prospects, along comes Cheney. It Seems a bit greedy to me. By his own admission he ran the Bush presidency most of eight long years. A recent Wall Street Journal article suggested that indeed he has his eye on the prize seriously. br />
Prepare to laugh as you watch the "Rough" draft of a potential Cheney for President campaign video! One thing it isn't - is serious. See it here first!

Posted by Newscat in Bizarre News at 06:00 Open Comments

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Rep. Pete Olson R-Texas now holds the record for the shortest town hall meeting ever! It's a pity too. He had a lovely parable to share about an imaginary girl, with child - doomed due to the Public Option. Wouldn't you know that the crowds were tutored a little too well in screaming and yelling, but first - a buzzkill who reads, proved Olson's point to be wrong. Watch Worst for a great Donnybrook, with Olson shuffling off to Buffallo within 47 seconds from first entering the room, while yelling "Wow! Wow!"

Rear Admiral Gregory J Smith did a quick about face! He re-hired the Renden Group to provide journalists to embed with the troops. Stars and Stripes tapped him on his brassy shoulder and reminded him that they'd been fired, because they graded journalists as to whether they were willing to emphasize positive coverage! Perhaps from now on, if you'll excuse the expression, we'll receive news that is more fair and balanced.

Virginia Beach Robert F McDonnell IS the American Taliban! He does have one of the more unique resume's as a candidate for Governor of Virginia. Watch Worst for more of his astounding views! Women especially will be impressed with his ideas for us as expressed in a 1989 Masters Thesis. Hint: you cannot work! He is presuming the man who knocked you up does the honorable thing. No need for contraception, fornicators (interesting for a politician), homosexuals, and.....you simply must see it to believe it! Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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Artist William Jones has been In the art biz for years to no real avail, but in less than a week from the time his video showed on youtube, it went viral, and from then, he has been swamped with orders! The jeans range in price from $159 to over five hundred. The muse landed on Jones' shoulder a few years ago. He was walking behind an attractive woman and couldn't help but notice her tush, he said. "It dawned on me: those are winking at me," he said. "I got to thinking that if I put an eye there, it would wink."Fashion writers have called Winkers "disturbingly awesome" and a "creative idea gone wrong." Winkers jeans, may be for you too. Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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A new talking point for the Far Out Right! Unlike most of their talking points, and reasons for fearing the worst, this time, scientists are involved in the research. Canadian researchers, who must be master grant writers, are studying how to combat zombies. They're envisioning the parallels between zombie plagues and infectious diseases,the latter a sure result of the Obama health care plan for conservatives, and a whimsical possibiltiy for those who have no insurance and advocate the new plan in spite of United Healthcare's generous funding of politicians and themselves.

Keith is joined by Max Brooks, author of 38 books on the undead, and author of the 'Zombie Survival Guide,' due out soon. The pathetic and true point Brooks makes is that as absurd as this is, he is certain that if Limbaugh and his ilk push this nefarious plot by the Democrats, it's only a short time before we hear of Democrats setting up war rooms, with websites to instruct their zombies. This can't get off of the ground without Limbaugh, so keep an ear and a shot-gun cocked...just in case. As you're aware, they've spread more bizarre things which have been received as if they were the very tablets delivered by Moses himself.

If zombies truly existed, they would cause the collapse of civilization. Civilization is a dubious name for the place and times in which we live, but it can break down much further I'm assured. Fortunately many in the far right have been amply prepared for this very thing. Naturally the implosion of society follows something they've been preparing for low these many years. Civilians will finally get to use the rations they've stocked, as well as the armories of guns and ammo! It's a Republican wet dream. Watch, and see if perhaps Sarah Palin isn't already aware, else why would she attend Zombie Days, not a peach festival, a sausage fest, a Furrie convention, the Annual Oyster STampede in Grays Harbor, or a Red Hat lady get together...nope, she found and attended a Zombie Days Weekend.

Brooks doesn't address the possibility that they shoot back, or first! Dick Cheney shot a perfectly nice non-zombie - who went so far as to apologize for his face being in the outdoors where Cheney might hit him. Let's hope those Canadian researchers are well funded! Test your possible survival odds against the zombies, and other great information! Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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In a recent Playboy magazine interview, someone actually took time out and read it! That's not the big news however, Alec Baldwin mentioned that he had no use for Sen. Joe Lieberman, and would gladly move in order to run against him. Whether Baldwin was serious or not, the Lieberhosen picked up the gauntlet! With bravado, aplomb, and a Dirty Harry - like squint, Lieberman is reported to have said, "Go ahead, make my day." See them on Worst, and decide who is the better actor and comedian!

Nicolle Wallace, former Bush advisor isn't denying a thing. As the truth of how the Bush administration used the threat of terror in criminal and unprecedented ways,she's not at all bothered or concerned. It seems her complaint is that when describing how the directives to Homeland Security started to smell like bait on a hot day, Ridge described how he started to "wonder and ponder." To Ms Wallace, those are "wussified" words. I shudder to think about the lexicon at Cheney Central, when we know the great contempt with which they hold the American public, and strength of their conviction of being above the law extends to everyone on the payroll from Cheney on down.

Mayor Ian Stafford of Preesall, Lancashire, UK. Preesall must be one of those idyllic villages, small where most people know or recognize one another. Also Mayor Stafford wore several hats, of various kinds. He was the Mayor, gardener, and handyman. What was not widely known, was that he was the reason that the lady's knickers of Preesall were vanishing! Yes, he was the sticky fingered knicker nabber everyone had been searching for. They're not cheap you know, then one does wonder where they've gone...and tries not to wonder why. The mystery was solved when the mayor was found enjoying himself, half naked, wearing yet one more "hat" which wasn't originally intended for headwear. He's a Renaissance man of sorts, Mayor, gardener, handyman, knicker nabber, town pervert.....jack of all trades, and "master of his own domain." (a nod of course, to Seinfeld.) Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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Oh Michelle, this is possibly the least loony thing you've said this year! Quoted in World Net Daily, Bachmann was asked if she wished to run for president. Great news everyone, she is but one voice in her head away from leading our country! Personally, I hope she does receive a cerebral call, but that it relays a directive or two which are a bit more safe, and perhaps entertaining than telling her it's time to step up to the political plate! Yes, sirs and madams, please watch Worst to see the special communication she's awaiting, and where she obviously gets her more whimsical notions, though I'd have bet on the voice of the neighbor's dog. Paul F. Tompkins explains why Bachmann isn't in the loony bin for expecting voices from on high, where if you were to hear Alexander Graham Bell, for instance, you'd be in a butterfly net. Apparently God didn't tell her that her son had joined Americorps, after he'd clued her in that it was a socialist, government brainwashing camp.

Tom Delay is apparently impossible to shame. pushed out of the House and disgraced, Tompkins and Keith ponder how Delay might win this round. Will it be a passionate, slinky, mayhaps sleazy Tango, or will he let his freak flag fly with a Hip Hop routine, reminiscent of Tom Cruise, as his character Les Grossman's brother More, in the movie Tropic Thunder? I know where my money is! Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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Just in! Joe the erstwhile plumber and icon for the right wing 'everyman' will be trying his hand at stand-up comedy, in the 'Funniest Celebrity in Washington" contest. There is no word as to whether his turn at the mike will include a written routine, or he'll just be himself speaking on the issues of the day. Facebook | Digg | Reddit | Stumble | Buzz it! | Email Article |

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