Finding Religious Tolerance in Texas is like Telling Sneakers O'Toole to take his Sneakers off!
Down here in Dumbutt we have this horrible thing called the Texas Board of Education. It is made up of 15 members, 5 Democrats, and 10 Republicans, 7 and sometimes 9 of whom are Evangelical Fundamentalist Christians who have a BIBLICAL WORLD VIEW in which the BIBLE trumps The Constitution.
Their central issue has been to put "creation science" which they have renamed "intelligent design" into our science classes and science text books. They came up one vote short recently and have now switched from Biblisizing science to Biblisizing social sciences. They have appointed "experts" to overall Texas History books. These experts are for the most part Evangelical ministers and preachers who hold "constructionist" views that our nation should be based upon scripture rather than the constitution.
Presently they are trying to revise history by removing Caesar Chavez from our student knowledge base and replacing him with Newt Gingrich, Right to Life organizations and Jerry Falwell and the Moral Majority. Any changes will not take affect until the 2012 school year which gives them lots of time to fuck up the Texas even more than they already have. With the way things are going now with the very unpopular idea of health care reform, by 2012 President Palin and Vice President Ted Nugent are sure to be added to all our nations text books as the ground work for rapture and the Second Coming.
Parade Magazine - you know that simple minded wad of newsprint tucked near the entertainment pages of your Sunday paper - has the highest circulation of any magazine in America with 70 million readers. On this weeks first page, called Personality Parade, a reader asks columnist Walter Scott if there are any Celebrity Conservatives. Mr Scott gives us a list.
Ted Nugent, Sara Evans, John Rich, John Elway, Curt Schilling, Robert Duvall, Kelsey Grammer, Angie Haramon, Patricia Heaton, Jon Voight, Jamine Tuner, Gary Sinise and of course Arnold.
Not recognizing most of those names causes me trouble in what defines "celebrity". I thought it meant someone everyone has heard of. So I believe that list needs adjusting.
First off lets remove the flash in the pans: Sara Evans, John Rich, Curt Schilling, Angie Haramon, Patricia Heaton, Jamine Tuner and Gary Sinise. I also think the Governor of California is a too moderate to be included.
Just off the top of my head I can think of two more to add, Mary Tyler Moore and Drew Carey.
So using the Parade's Personality Page as the starting point, the short list would be Ted Nugent, John Elway, Robert Duvall, Kelsey Grammer, Jon Voight, Mary Tyler Moore and Drew Carey.
I enjoy the list because it puts John Elway, Robert Duvall, Kelsey Grammer, Jon Voight, Mary Tyler Moore and Drew Carey on equal footing with Ted Nugent.
I like to imagine Ted inviting them all to his new ranch down here in Texas to enjoy machine gunning penned up animals he buys. Well to be honest, he also kills these animals he buys and releases with compound bows, crossbows, .50 caliber rifles and .44 magnum hand guns. Ted strives to be fair.
A couple years ago Ted Nugent moved down here to Texas from Michigan where it seems his welcome was wearing thin. He bought a ranch near Crawford, Texas to be near his idol, George W. Bush. The President recently sold his Crawford ranch and no longer goes there. Perhaps because even someone as obtuse as George W doesn't want to be living anywhere near a crazyass racist moron armed with a high powered machine gun (yes he has a license).
Ted Nugent was tossed out of San Antonio several years back for wrapping himself in an American flag and telling all the "Spics" to get their asses back to Mexico. He also refers to African Americans as "Apes". His greatest enjoyment in life is killing animals, most of which he buys and pens up and then uses machine guns on. He brags about killing neighbor's pet dogs and cats and is our nations' loudest voice perpetuating assault rifles, handguns and our violent gun culture.
With an IQ never breaking out of single digits he also enjoys sharing the bottom teir of Right-wing radio talk show hosts with Michael Savage and Michael Reagan. To get an idea of just how stupid Ted Nugent is, read this review on his Book God, Guns and Rock & Roll.
Oh, and for your enjoyment here is Ted in Concert telling Governor Schwarzenegger, Senator Barbra Boxer, Senator Barack Obama (who he calls a piece of shit) and Senator Hillary Clinton to shove the machine gun he is waving around into their mouths and pull the trigger.
Kay Bailey Hutchinson once referred to as a moderate Republican has decided that being a Senator in Washington is a lot more work that being Governor of Texas. Texas Governors are short on power and long on relaxing. So she is coming home from the Beltway to take Rick Perry's job away from him.
Not long ago Hutchinson was double digit poll numbers ahead of Governor Perry (who has the nicest hair in Texas, for a man) but has suffered a few setbacks lately.
The fair Senator from Texas lost ground by spending too much time up there in Washington with all those gun grabbers, atheists, socialists and you know... darkies up there for too many months in a row. All while Governor Perry was out and about doing Tea Parties with Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity winning over the Republican Base here in Texas by standing on the Alamo to talk of seceding from the United States. That's hard politics to beat down here in Dumbutt. She also made a very serious misstep by telling Governor Perry that if he did not pull out of the election to give her a free run without a primary, that she will resign from the Senate to run full time against him.
Now on her road for redemption with the Republican Base, Senator Hutchinson has just declared she will vote against the conformation of Sonia Sotomayer. Here in a state where Hispanics are the fastest growing electorate other than California.
To win the Republican nomination for Governor here in Texas, Hutchinson is going to have to become even crazier than wingnut Rick Perry. So expect to see this once reasonable old lady smiling with a .44 magnum in photo ops, reciting Sarah Palin anomalies and even perhaps talking of reinstating slavery after secession... More on Senator Hutchinson going Wingnut at Houston Chronicle
"For God's sake, I sell ice cream. What threat am I to them... These people have friends and family members, I am a marked man." McDonald explained to reporters why he will not go back to driving the ice cream truck.
For the second time since barely passing in 2001, Texas prosecutors have added the much hated hate crime option to three Houston men. You may recall the only other hate crime prosecuted in Texas was when three white boys rammed a pvc pipe up the ass of a Hispanic boy a few years back who later committed suicide. 45 States Have Statutes Criminalizing Hate Crimes
These three guys from left; Christopher elledge, Troy Elledge and Dale Howell are in jail with $30,000 bonds, and because of the much hated Hate Crime Bill here in Texas could face up to life in prison. We do not like Hate Crime bills down here in Dumbutt. After all, it could very well creep up behind our friends and relatives and send them to prison for much longer than the really deserve for just doing what needs to be done.
After losing his job to the recession, 44 year old African American Victor McDonald began work driving an ice cream truck. These three Texans rammed their car into the front of his truck to stop it. They then got hold of him through the back door and beat the crap out of him while screaming obscenities interlaced with the N-Word. He suffered a broken nose, a fractured eye socket and now two weeks later has trouble seeing. Full story at Houston Chronicle
Good to see the people of Tennessee striving to become even dumber than the people of Texas! Heeee Haaaaw! Though I do hear from many named sources that Oklahoma is the dumbest place on Earth. I did spent a year their once blowing stuff up with a gun that shot 8 inch diameter bullets! It was so cool, you could see the bullet go and when it hit, wow!
Stephen Colbert did a good job here of showing not only the who, what and where of NRA members, but the LOOK and what they spend most of their time ponderin'.
Texas recently DID NOT PASS a new law allowing guns at State University keg parties, but only because the Texas Legislature went home before they could unanimously vote for it. There may be a special session called soon as it is important that we get more guns at more campus keg parties before the Fall semester or... Um... Um... Terrorists will infiltrate on campus fraternities and um... um... And travel to Nashville bars to shoot our women and children.
Yesterday we did an article about Texas Governor Rick Perry appointing a Christian Creationist to replace another Christian Creationist to head the State Board of Education in Texas - the organization which decides public school text book content and curriculum. We also took note that Health Education courses (students learning to prevent obesity, pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases) were no longer required courses in the state of Texas. Rick Perry Picks Creationist Gail Lowe to replace Creationist Don Mcleroy
Keeping in tune with an educational system of ever duller knives and larger guns we learn today that this same body controlled by the Texas Taliban is planning on reducing or removing from Texas textbooks content about Abraham Lincoln (Yankee war criminal),Ceaser Chavez (Hispanic communist activist) and Supreme Court Justice Thurgood Marshall(Black Attorney who won Brown v Education which struck down segregation in public schools). This all in the face of an ever increasing Hispanic and Black populace. So say two of the six experts assigned to this project which includes Peter Marshall of Marshall Ministries - a Texas Preacher aligned with the Christian Constructionist movement which strives to REPLACE The Constitution with the Bible. Peter Marshall Ministries
On the dark side - these Texas Taliban members have not only the committee votes to pass this crap, but the voting public on their side. To add to the darkness the Texas buy for these textbooks is so big that other states will opt in to save money. I am sure you can guess which states those might be.
On the bright side - along with guns on college campuses, in bars, workplace parking lots and of course churches - children outside of Texas will have a much better advantage to succeed in college, compete for good jobs and survive to find such jobs.
Many of us, though a vast minority, down here in Dumbutt find ourselves lying when asked where we are from.
Governor Rick Perry - who has even nicer hair than Rod Blagojevich - has appointed Gail Lowe rather than Cynthia Dunbar to head the Texas Board of eduction to replace Don McLeroy. This keeps the board unchanged with 7 to 9 of the 15 votes being evangelical fundamentalist Creationists deciding what Texas children read and learn.
You remember Cynthia Dunbar who uses the terms "unconstitutional", "tyrannical" and a "tool of perversion" to describe public education. More on Cynthia Dunbar on Kick!
Also note that with the Governors' help the state of Texas last week removed Health Education from the required list of Public School courses. Texas with the highest rate of child obesity, and close to the highest rates of teen pregnancies and STDs will no longer require students to learn how best to eat and how best to not get HIV and pregnant.
As they say down here it Texas, we may not be the sharpest knives in the drawer but who needs sharp knives when we all have a .44 magnum in our pocket! Texas drops health education requirement
Gail Lowe is different than Dunbar and McLeroy in that...
Well let's see. She rejects the science of Global Warming and Climate Change, she will not tolerate gay friendly books in public school libraries and of course she not only believes that the Earth is 6000 years old and men live in gigantic fishes at the bottom of the sea, but wants to teach that to children in Texas Public Schools. So the difference seems to be that Don McLeroy and Cynthia Dunbar have repeatedly and loudly PROVEN themselves to be nastyass right-wing fundamentalist nitwits while Gail Lowe has yet to PROVE that as LOUDLY. Governor Perry Appoints another Creationist to School Board
Governor Rick Perry is up against Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison for the Governorship in 2010. Hutchison is a moderate Republican - moderate meaning advancing unregulated financial markets, reducing taxes on the wealthy and putting assault rifles in every home, car, college, bar and church in Texas. So our present Governor is positioning himself to he political Right of Rush Limbaugh and intellectually a step or two below Glenn Beck. Governor Perry is a walking talking self enclosed Texas Tea Party.
I enjoy the list because it puts John Elway, Robert Duvall, Kelsey Grammer, Jon Voight, Mary Tyler Moore and Drew Carey on equal footing with Ted Nugent.
Kay Bailey Hutchinson once referred to as a moderate Republican has decided that being a Senator in Washington is a lot more work that being Governor of Texas. Texas Governors are short on power and long on relaxing. So she is coming home from the Beltway to take Rick Perry's job away from him.
Now on her road for redemption with the Republican Base, Senator Hutchinson has just declared she will vote against the conformation of Sonia Sotomayer. Here in a state where Hispanics are the fastest growing electorate other than California.
For the second time since barely passing in 2001, Texas prosecutors have added the much hated hate crime option to three Houston men. You may recall the only other hate crime prosecuted in Texas was when three white boys rammed a pvc pipe up the ass of a Hispanic boy a few years back who later committed suicide. 
After losing his job to the recession, 44 year old African American Victor McDonald began work driving an ice cream truck. These three Texans rammed their car into the front of his truck to stop it. They then got hold of him through the back door and beat the crap out of him while screaming obscenities interlaced with the N-Word. He suffered a broken nose, a fractured eye socket and now two weeks later has trouble seeing. 
Yesterday we did an article about Texas Governor Rick Perry appointing a Christian Creationist to replace another Christian Creationist to head the State Board of Education in Texas - the organization which decides public school text book content and curriculum. We also took note that Health Education courses (students learning to prevent obesity, pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases) were no longer required courses in the state of Texas. 
Well let's see. She rejects the science of Global Warming and Climate Change, she will not tolerate gay friendly books in public school libraries and of course she not only believes that the Earth is 6000 years old and men live in gigantic fishes at the bottom of the sea, but wants to teach that to children in Texas Public Schools. So the difference seems to be that Don McLeroy and Cynthia Dunbar have repeatedly and loudly PROVEN themselves to be nastyass right-wing fundamentalist nitwits while Gail Lowe has yet to PROVE that as LOUDLY. 
