Tension erupts into violence in the Romney war room when the news of John Stewart’s ‘brutal’ comparison of Bain Capital to Bane the Batman villain reaches the fuhrer’s ears! Before the dastardly revelation on ‘The Daily Show’ Romney thought his cover story about his tenure at Bain was flying. Now the media wants to see his tax records and magic underwear! Says Romney, dismissing Karl Rove’s ingenious ‘retroactive retirement’ plan: “Sure I was CEO…A cardboard figurehead until 2002. I wanted to be a figurehead President! I’m entitled to that aren’t I?” Well, at least he’s not a Kenyan Muslim.