Seth Meyers has GREAT news for single Trump supporters who are searching for that someone special. Introducing – the ‘Trump Mingle Dating App.’ Get in on the greatest, big league dating app for smart, Trumpcentric singles. Hey ladies, have you just had it with bad hombres and bad dudes? Guys, are you sick and tired of meeting women who get uppity if you just grab ’em or kiss them – even if they’re only eights or maybe sevens?
With the exception of Mary Matalin and James Carville – and nobody knows what’s up with that deal; politics is causing a rise in divorces and break-ups, when one partner discovers that the other doesn’t have sense enough to pour piss out of a boot – or to avoid voting for someone who showers in it.
Leave losers and haters behind – and find really smart, like-minded mates with good brains.Trump’s patented, extreme vetting technology matches you with people who share your dislikes. You’ll spend hours tearing down the performances of underrated actors. Laughing at failing publications, and clicking thumbs-down on all left-leaning fake news videos – together!
There are too many fantastic features to mention, but the happy couples will convince you! To paraphrase another great President; Cupid, tear down that wall! Let love in, then patch it up before a bad hombre sneaks through.
Oh, and don’t forget the 30% discount for Russian mail-order brides.