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Jon Stewart: Blueless in Texas, Greg Abbott up by 20

Democrats in Texas are like the drunk guy in a bar who keeps hitting on that lesbian

Turning Texas Blue BluesSince last week, before Wendy Davis appeared on the Daily Show, Greg Abbott has increased his lead over Wendy Davis by 5 points. He now has a 20 point lead, which was my guess on how this election would go last year.

Jon Stewart is right, Texas will not be turning blue anytime soon, after all, keeping it red is what the guns are for. It is why we see assault rifles carried into restaurants and strip malls.

Texas has been a conservative state since dinosaurs roamed here 6000 years ago say Texas high school textbooks.

Greg Abbott sued Obama 30 times, says Democrats are a bigger threat to America than North Korea, that we need more guns and Bibles taught in schools. That makes him a liberal when compared to right-wing radio host Dan Patrick who is going to win the LT Governor spot also by about 20 points.

You could not be redder than Dan Patrick if you took The Big Red Dog and shoved it up the Devil’s ass

And the math. How could a 4% increase in Hispanic voters in the next six years translate to a 25 point gain in elections? What is that? Misplaced optimism or Common Core math?

Texas is becoming like Mississippi – a state every Texan loves because without Mississippi Texas would take last place in education, health care and taking care of children, the old and the poor – where it is well understood by one and all that Republican means White and Democrat means Black. The difference here in Texas is that though Republican means White, Democrat means Black and Hispanic. Hispanics not much of a problem in Mississippi. I am not sure if it is because they dpm’t allow Hispanics there or if Hispanics know, like everyone else, knows not to go there for any reason, ever.