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Jon Stewart rips Ted Cruz, though Republican Peter King rips harder

“We need intelligent debate in the country. Ted Cruz may be an intelligent person, but he doesn’t carry out an intelligent debate, he oversimplifies, he exaggerates and he basically led the Republican Party over the cliff in the fall of 2013, he has shown no qualifications, no legislation being passed, doesn’t provide leadership and he has no real experience, so, to me, he is just a guy with a big mouth and no results. I hope that day [Cruz wins the GOP nomination] never comes. I will jump off that bridge when we come to it.” Republican Neo Con from New York Representative Peter King

Ted Cruz at HogwartSo Ted Cruz kicks off his presidential run at Jerry Falwell’s Liberty Baptist University in Virginia when the students were REQUIRED to attend. Can you think of any univerisity in the world where students are REQUIRED to attend something? Well other than Bob Jones University. And from the looks of the all personal relationship with Jesus Christs crowd even they are wary of this horrid man.

To further muddy the waters here on the most Right-wing GOP candidate since Jeffereson Davis, I heard he did not announce in Iowa or S Carolina because too much of the GOP Base there would resent him for having an Ivy League education when they only have Pig Farming certificates from the Future Farmers of America.

Also a few tea shirts out in the crowd should remind us that Rand Paul also has a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and will not accept evolution or global warming.  I hear the two denials in that are connected in that God made everything in a few days and he now has his finger on the temperature dial and moves it around on a whim. That is when he isn’t busy giving cancer to children or aborting babies. God is Great.

And of course after Ted Cruz warn them of Big Brother invading their privacy he tells them all to phone in “constitution 3733” which grabs their phone number for his campaign.

More and more I am understanding that when you hear a candidate use the world CONSTITUTION they are lunatics who have no idea what they are talking about, or have ever read it.

“No person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President.” Section 1 Article 2 of the US Constitution