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Jordan Klepper joins New York Drunk Santa bar hopping

santa clause peeing on a buildingThis picture depicts another big difference between urban and rural life. In rural areas you can pretty much pee wherever you want. That’s what the field behind the Dairy Queen is for. Inside is for pinching a loaf only.

I would guess one of the main differences between rural and urban is how often one has to put up with drunks on a bus or a subway late at night. Even LATE AT NIGHT is an issue I suppose. Or buses and subways for that matter. And shoes and dentists.

Speaking from a experience on this issue, hold off on that first pee as long as you can, and switching from beer to Jack and a splash solves the problem entirely. EITHER OR, not both.  Much like another issue we talk without the walk. Beer or weed. EITHER OR not both.