On Last Week Tonight John Oliver files a hilarious report on the ultimatum made by Australia’s Minister of Agriculture, Barnaby Joyce – to Johnny Depp’s little dogs Pistol and Boo. Barnaby Joyce doesn’t appear to like animals, and he likes Hollywood movie stars even less. When Johnny Depp smuggled two illegal aliens Pistol and Boo in on his private jet, Barnaby Joyce made it clear that they don’t break the laws for “movie stars, even if they’ve been the sexiest man alive – twice.” I didn’t know that – did you? Well, Joyce did, and he gave the two adorable terriers 50 hours to live…snarking “It’s time for Pistol and Boo to bugger off to the United States.” Start the countdown clock !It looked as if Joyce would enjoy nothing more than enforcing his euthanasia decision on the hapless castaways.
This was indisputably the highpoint of Barnaby Joyce’s career. His venom toward Depp was rather telling, and unbecoming of a government minister. The decision was not a popular one, even with fellow Australians, with one speaking for many saying, “Shut up Barnaby, you insensitive wanker.”
The entire episode seemed to be a bit overly personal to Barnaby Joyce, but he was speaking in his official capacity for Australia…So, it’s personal to us too! Calling it ‘The Russell Crowe of countries” John Oliver thinks it’s is only fitting that we should send Australia’s undesirables back to them! A hilarious montage follows, with a narrator lending gravitas to the list of stuff Australia can have back – like Vegemite – any objections? I thought not. How about music like Midnight Oil? Don’t forget Rupert Murdoch and Mel F***** Gibson. Hugh Jackman. Forget about it, we’re keeping him, for obvious reasons.
The koala joey at the Los Angeles zoo has 50 hours or we’re shooting him in his adorable face…And it will be on you Barnaby Joyce.
For America, Last Week Tonight says “G’Day M******s!”