ONION: Obama…’I Will Allow 10 States To Secede But No More’

ONION News review Nov 12, Obama makes offer to ten states to secede, Olivia Newton John & Travolta crash market, Elmo confesses, Afghanistan a shockPresident Obama makes a reasonable offer to citizens of the ten states who collected the most signatures to secede…And a better one to the 40 who put in less effort. Elmo confesses his discomfort. Voters suffer post-election let-down. The financial impact is felt upon the release of John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John’s holiday album, and the nation is horrified to learn about the war in Afghanistan, while reading up on the Petraeus scandal. This and much more in the Onion Week in Review.