Cutting ties with Alabama is imperative if we wish to protect the global image of the United States. The split is the first step of a radical recommendation by marketers at the public relations firm Hill & Knowlton Strategies, Inc (via the Onion)…And certainly not of this blog! The P.R. people wish to re-image America by drawing attention to states such as California and Colorado. Doing so will (in theory) minimize visible ills such as obesity, teen pregnancy and racial intolerance which are 'dragging down the image of a flourishing democracy. ' Listen! The sound you hear is Lynyrd Skynyrd…They're adding another verse to 'Sweet Home Alabama' which will take Neil Young off of the hook at long last.
I must add that the P.R. firm is obviously unaware of 'The People of Walmart” series of videos, which proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that the societal ills named are not confined to one part of the country, but are spreading to every state and municipality where cable and spandex are available.