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Stephen Colbert: Hatchet weilding Hitchhiker Kia saves the day on California highway

hatchet hitchhiking

This one reminds me of  something I have never had, too much fun!  Everything about this has ONION written all over it. Let’s work it out just with some questions?

Who hitchhikes anymore?
Who picks up hitchhikers anymore?
How many hitchhikers carry an ax?
How many people who pick up hitchhikers weight between 300 and 400 pounds?
How many people who pick up hitchhikers think they are Jesus Christ?
Why would someone claiming to be Jesus want to squash a “NWORD?”
With Jesus having the Packer fan lady in a bear hug, how much would that all weigh together?
What if Kia had missed and they fell on him?
It took three whacks of an ax to bring down Jesus, which end of it did he use?
Who is this mystery Jesus, where is he now and where’s the picture of his head?
Can we give a civilian the Silver Star?
Could this have all gone down anywhere other than California?
Will Kia, who actually deserves more than 15 minutes, get rich?
Why do I like that guy so much?
And finally, how did this all get resolved so well without an assault rifle?