Gold: Winner Phil Hammonds, the Superintendent of Schools of Jefferson Country, Alabama, who saw nothing wrong with equally demented math teacher Gregory Harrison’s methods of utilizing geometry in an everyday situation – if you’re training to be a sniper. Granted, using the game of pool, for instance, as an example of angles in geometry does deprive the school of a much needed personal visit by the Secret Service.
Silver: Feathers fly as Nevada’s own Senate hopeful, Chicken Lady Sue Lowden, is seen in a recent interview as she argued that she had never made the infamous statement that she "wasn’t backing down from the barter system!" To recap, this is the system which compassionate doctors practiced with our grandparents in days of yore, and no one who was conscious can possibly forget her defense of the odd barter system…except for Lowden. Realizing her mistake with the passage of time, she vehemently denied her stance, exclaiming "I never said that!" Alas, in the good old days of our grandparents, they didn’t have video replay!
Bronze: Sarah Palin on Fox. In her role as special commentator, Palin proves to be less than prescient when queried by another mental midget, Sean Hannity, asking her to predict the outcome of the special election between Mark Crist and Tim Burns, as if either Hannity or Palin has a finger on the pulse of the electorate. Yes, it’s an epic fail, but my…how Fox News has motivated her. If only McCain’s coaches had thought to wave large bills, her learning curve might not have stayed flat-lined throughout his campaign.