If you’ve been following the plight of the lost Russian sex geckos, John Oliver presents a sad update tonight. Earlier this summer, John brought the Russian Gecko space program to worldwide attention with his #gogetthosegeckos campaign. The unwary geckos had been launched, so Russian scientists could assess the effects of zero gravity on the sex lives of the horny little lizards.
Things shortly went awry when Russian authorities lost contact with the gecko party capsule, and the little lizards truly were lost in space…Which was careless of the Russian Space program and of Geico in my opinion. At that time there was still hope. We could imagine the little travelers enjoying the social opportunities afforded them as they circled the earth – in what we presume was the first space orgy, but I haven’t checked SNOPES to confirm that assumption, so don’t quote me.
Sadly, we have learned the fate of the geckos.When the satelite landed, all aboard had frozen due to equipment failure, except for the fruit flies…Whose relatives I’m swatting as I write this. We don’t know at this time whether the equipment was faulty or the geckos were simply too distracted to do routine maintenance.
John Oliver enlists the band’ A Great Big World’ to help him pay tribute to the sacrifice the geckos made for science, with the song “Say Something.” John says, “They are having high pitched sex on the ceiling of God’s bedroom.” I hope he’s right.
So raise a glass, do a five-gecko tongue salute, and sing along with John, “A Great Big World” and a rather large Space Gecko as they pay tribute to the brave five who froze for love and the furthering of space exploration.