On Last Week Tonight (last week) John Oliver discovered how simple it is to found a church and collect millions of tax-free dollars by legally fleecing the flock – and that was the moment he founded the “Church of Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption.” Today, just one week later, we have an update on the blessings raining down upon the shiny, new mega-church!
MegaReverend John, and Wanda Jo use the ‘prosperity doctrine’ model, whereby one demands ‘seed money’ from congregants in exchange for blessings. A large offering is necessary for a large blessing. That is reportedly how the Lord works…And who can argue? ‘The Lord’ provides generously for the mega-crooks who fleece the flock. Actually, I misspoke; it is my opinion that slime-balls who con vulnerable people are crooks, but what they do is entirely legal.
On the bright side, Oliver’s congregation (formerly known as ‘viewers’) really came through this week, as you can see! John displays the staggering bounty, but don’t let the size of the haul fool you. Literal minded congregants who took the words ‘seed money’ to mean actual seeds, will not receive blessings to match the size of their 25 pound bags.. Some inexplicably sent beef jerky, while one wrote a check of a billion dollars! A few stapled cash to scary notes, and this is the behavior Rev. Oliver would like to encourage in the new congregation, who haven’t been to church in some time, or they’d know how the money thing works…And it does work like a charm! Just ask Wanda Jo, who is jet skiing in Hawaii.
Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption P.O. Box 1954 NY, NY 10443