Newcomer Fred Thompson was named the best in last
night’s Republican “Foghorn Leghorn sound-alike
contest.” The Tennessee Republican finished well
ahead of the other contenders in the nationally
televised contest, with Massachusetts Mitt Romney
receiving honorable mention for his new haircut, and
Duncan Hunter given a nod for his hawkish views.
Thompson also garnered praise from the judges for his
striking resemblance to a Little Abner character, the
corrupt, conspiratorial blowhard Senator Jack S.
Phogbound. The judging committee decided an award for
that may be a little bit too much like art imitating
life, and discouraged any supplemental award for
Thompson, however.
“I am happier than a pig in poop,” Thompson remarked
after the announcement. He then pointed out this was
not his first foray into entertainment. He said he
has been attempting for some time to bring out his
imitations of a one-role actor, another involving
an incredibly lazy politician with a gold-digging
trophy wife.