Gold: John Pistole the head of TSA, and his minions great and small are all deserving of this award. I don’t know how many potential terrorists they’ve caught since the new intimate and extremely thorough techniques have been implemented – but it’s likely that they’ve given ‘birth’ to some on the spot. Of course they only go the extra mile on the suspicious passengers, like Jean Webber’s mother. She doesn’t look scary to you or to me, but these are highly trained professionals. As such, their spidey sense told them that the wheelchair bound, 95-yr-old Leukemia patient had a bomb in her adult diaper. A waking nightmare ensued.
As further proof of their infallibility, TSA stands by their official statement, stating that the event never happened, and that they treated the two women in a "respectful and sensitive manner."
Silver: Newt Gingrich is obligated to make all of the correct noises regarding the New York Same-Sex Union act. After all, it has the words ‘union’ and ‘same sex’- which conservatives hate on principle. Newt may have forgotten himself when, carried away – he launched into the past. Yessir, it was 1996, and Newt was the sponsor of the Defense of Marriage Act, followed closely by the Preservation of Irony Bill.
Bronze: Greta Van Susteren wins for overlooking the obvious and an instant segue into blame. ‘The Obvious’ is slap happy Justice Prosser, whose physical attack on liberal Wisconsin Justice Ann Walsh was just another work-day for the anger management drop-out. For Greta however, the attempted strangling wasn’t ‘Slappy’s fault, but the failing of Chief Justice Shirley Abrahamson, whom Susteren finds lacking in her alternate job description as zoo-keeper.