Gold: Sen. Joeseph Leiberman of CT. This is a public service message for those with possible PTSD – see your doctor. Leiberman and Coburn cannot justify silly programs like Social Security, can’t you see? We all must suck it up and pick out a shopping cart to live in as a retirement plan, the better to funnel yet more money into our monstrous defense budget. The alternative, unlikely though it seems is that this pair of post 9/11 nervous nellies get help. Perhaps the Defense Budget could cut out a war or two? Naw, I didn’t think so either.
Silver: Glenn Beck is so not upset about Spiderman’s racial and ethnic heritage! It’s even okay if he’s gay – WTW? This is no coincidence, but don’t get the idea that Beck cares! The fact that President Obama is bi-racial has to be the influence says he who cares not. Not so, say writers of the comic, although one hates to nip a Beck conspiracy in the bud. The new Spider-Man comic book features Miles Morales, a Black, Latino 13-yr-old from Brooklyn. "We just thought, ‘Wouldn’t it be cool if Spider-Man was biracial?’" said one of the writers of the comic, Brian Michael Bendis. "Somebody different than the comic book norm — who represented New York more." Nice try, you’ll never convince Beck – who doesn’t care one little bit that – like the President, this superhero is not a double for tow-headed, rosy cheeked Hitler Youth.
Bronze: The campaign to defeat Barrack Obama – and spelling. I suppose the President could change his name, just to be polite?