The New Hampshire Republican debate left someone out! Texas governor Rick Perry is coming to pray and shoot something near you! The GOP establishment’s savior from that batcrap crazy Michele Bachmann who won the debate! And who the entire lame stream media is now fawning over. Goodbye Sarah, Hello Michele!
For those not paying attention to Texas politics, Rick Perry is just like George W. Bush but dumber and meaner. Just what America needs to fix things, George W. Bush on steroids. As all the candidates in the debate say over and over again, what we need to do is what the Republicans did to get us into this mess, but do it harder, faster and with a lot more praying.
Rick Perry is most famous for his hair.
Rick Perry is also famous for his screeching about seceding from the Union on the steps of the Alamo at a Glenn Beck Tea Party Rally. Where is Glenn Beck anyway? I suppose in a bunker covered in dried food and gold.
Rick Perry is most famous down here in Dumbutt for decimating education at every level. From defunding pre school, to laying off teachers, increasing class size and taking billions from K-12. To raising tuition, raising interest on loans, removing scholarships and grants, taking away education opportunities from single mothers, and closing campuses for secondary education.
BTW, the much hyped bill to give fraternity boys assault weapons for campus keg parties was voted for overwhelmingly by the GOP super majority in the State House, but an Hispanic Democrat played a parliamentary trick on them and it failed. But Perry is having a special session to make sure there are guns in all the halls, classrooms, sporting events and keg parties on state university campuses. In fact it is the only positive measure he has taken in education.
Presently Pastor Perry has been praying his ass off everywhere he goes. In April he conducted three Texas Prayer meetings for rain to sooth our historic drought. It is now June 15 and not a drop. But that doesn’t mean praying is not the answer to our woes or that it doesn’t work! I have no idea why that is, but it may have something to do with being dumber than mud.
He is scheduled as the main speaker for the American Family Association prayer rally which will take place at Reliant Stadium – where the NFL plays and seats 85,000. The AFA is the leading advocate against gay marriage and only Christians are welcome. So all you Jews, Mormons, Hindus, Muslims and if I am not mistaken, Catholics can all go fck yerselves… God bless…
In fact just last night he shared the stage with Ann Coulter praying about something or other.
Oh and not to forget what makes him so popular that he destroyed Senator Kay Bailey Hutchinson in her bid for governor by 20 points.
Rick Perry jogs with a 9mm semi automatic handgun in his sweatpants. You
know like that Black NBA guy who did the same and shot himself in the
leg.
Perry had the opportunity to use it not long ago. On a jog through
the wooded suburbs of Austin he shot a rabid wolf which was about to
eat his daughter’s little puppy.
Well… It was a coyote (which is just
like a wolf), which wasn’t rabid (but it could of been), the dog was a
year old lab bigger than the coyote (but it was less than 7 dog years
old), and it actually was quite far away for a Deadeye Rick shot with a
handgun (though it froze and did not move). But he said it looked at him
funny so he killed it.
So right there you have then next president of
the United States! I ask you how many creatures has Obama shot and killed?
And that’s what it’s all about in Republican circles. Oh BTW, the coyote was unarmed. NRA
members, seldom confront armed individuals which could be dangerous. Though I suppose they would take shots from under the beds if necessary.