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Sex offender fined for licking and fondling cardboard hottie

The life-sized cardboard cut-outs that you see in stores and movie theater lobbies have achieved their goal of blending in and appearing to be real live people – albeit rather one-dimensional to most of us. To others they are extremely life-like. We know this because of an unheard-of incident recorded by Pittsfield, Ma police.

On Saturday evening an intoxicated Charlie J. Price sailed into a Rite Aid and was quickly inflamed by passion. He was face to face with the beautiful Foster Grant sun-glass-display model. She didn’t demur when – according to police, Charlie "grabbed hold of the sun-glass display, hugged it tightly and then began to lick and kiss the face of the female party on the display." According to police, this went on for about a minute, then gravity took over. The two lovers rolled on the floor, blissfully unaware of shocked and frightened customers edging away from them.

Price, the easily-inflamed and passionate lover is a Level 3 sex offender – but this was love! He was detained and fined $200. for his heated display of passion.