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SNL Cold Open, Piers Morgan George Zimmerman & Samantha Scheibe, Nov 23 2013

I like bad boys, and a man who’s features are like vacuumed right into the center of his face

SNL Samantha ScheibeThe question should be, “Samantha, didn’t you see this coming?”

With that little computer animation of George Zimmerman going from gun store to liquor store to gun store I got to thinking. What with “ATF” standing for Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms why not make the Bureau more efficient by having all three products sold only in one location. One stop shopping for guns, Jack Daniels and bongs. Now that is American Exceptionalism!

BTW, the Zimmerman family is saying Samantha Scheibe is a bitter woman who is faking pregnancy to try and hold on to the man she is so lucky to have. They tell us there was no gun and she broke the table because he was leaving her and Florida for greener pastures.

Would there be any doubt in your mind to where George Zimmerman may move to outside of Florida?  Hint: The governor jogs with a 9mm and shot a coyote that looked at him funny.