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Daily Show, Rudy Giuliani forgets 911 and John Oliver says Democrats are good at Black People

It was 78 years ago we heard the bottom line on all this crap from one smart cookie.

"All we have to fear is fear itself."

Almost 80 years after FDR gave us that famous refrain in his 1932 inaugural address we still don’t get it.

No enemy we have ever faced has beat our ass more effectively than Osama bin Laden and al Qaeda. They put our previously dullard President into checkmate in only four moves. They put a ring in his nose and made him do exactly what they wanted, and we all bought Depends and went along knowing the man was a moron.

They forced us into a War in Afghanistan which has become not only our longest war, but is now expanding in both cost and American lives.

They got us into Iraq where we lost twice as many Americans as they managed on 911.

They have cost us a trillion dollars while the Republicans reduced our taxes in a time of war (a historic precedent) causing the worst economic breakdown in our history since the Great Depression. They managed to get us to rescind much of our Bill of Rights, forced us into prison abuse and torture which showed our hypocrisy and destroyed our status throughout all parts of the world.

And of course they put the airline industry in peril and for the rest of us made flying a bigger pain in the ass than Glenn Beck.

Al Qaeda has won every round while we learn nothing from it. They act and we react in exactly the manner they wish. Having us grab our balls, poop our pants, destroy our budget and take away our individual rights. We do exactly what they want us to do.

As we crow about how advanced, powerful and smart we are, thumbing our noses at these Dark Age idiots they have us dancing to their tune. The reality is they are a lot smarter, committed and braver than we are.

We claim shoving a bomb up your ass and blowing yourself up for what you believe in is cowardly as we sit in trailer in Nevada with a joystick dropping bombs on someone 8000 miles away. While the rest of us hide under our beds pooping our pants. 

BTW, Bill Maher got thrown off of ABC for saying that. Lucky for me I don’t work for ABC. Lying is not much of an issue these days, it is the truth that gets one in deep trouble. Aka "light skinned", "no negro dialect" makes Obama electable. A truth so profound that even Obama has said the same.