SAG HARBOR, MI — Following the conviction and sentencing of Lewis “scooter” Libby, many of the faithful are doing whatever they can to commemorate the man and what he stands for. Sales of Scooter pies, a gooey treat of chocolate and marshmallow, have taken off in the eastern United States, while faithful young Republicans are invoking Mr. Libby’s nickname, and its commercial derivatives.
Maurice “Mo” Onsdocker of Sag Harbor, Michigan says they will nickname their infant son Devin “Scooter” Onsdocker’s neighbor, Willmette “Willie” Cassendroth, has already purchased a Vespa for the child. Cassendroth told a reporter, “We want to do anything we can to tell the world that we are not going to take the conviction of Scooter Libby lying down and we want to show everyone that our hearts, minds, and yes, even our children, are going to carry the flame in recognition that great man.
Lewis “Scooter” Libby was sentenced to 30 months in prison Tuesday after being convicted of obstruction of justice and perjury in the Valerie Plame affair. Sources close to Vice President Dick Cheney say Mr. Chaney has laid in a supply of Scooter Pies and is contemplating driving “some sort of Mo-Ped” as a way of saying “Go fk yourselves” to those that would condemn a man as kind and faithful as Libby. The statement has become a Cheney mantra ever since he initially uttered it to the Congress several years ago.