[In response to some elected Democrats saying we need to reach out to Trump voters. I agree, with a bowling ball]
How to deal with a Trumper in person:
Ten ways to win over a Trumper in person:
- You must first find them, they are often hard to see all decked out in camo behind trees or in some bushes looking for Hillary’s emails.
- Remember you have a politeness advantage because you can’t forget their name as it is usually stitched above their breast pocket.
- Ask when they will take you hunting.
- Ask for a ride on the 4 Wheeler.
- Ask what Hannity and Limbaugh had to say yesteday.
- Ask if they have any extra meth or fentanyl.
- Ask if that is new deck on the back of their doublewide.
- Bring beer!
- Ask what animals they have killed lately.
- Use the NWORD profusely.
Ten things to never say to a Trumper in person:
- That you went to college!!!!
- That you voted for Hillary.
- That you read books.
- That you don’t have a gun.
- That you missed the Monster Truck Rally last weekend.
- Say the words “Rachel” and “Maddow” together.
- Ask why he and his wife look so much alike.
- Speaking of which, don’t ask when he will make an honest woman of her.
- That you vacation in Mexico.
- Say that slavery had anything to do with the Civil War.