Minneapolis — Rock star Prince announced a new tour Wednesday. The musician and his Purple Revue will simply act at playing instruments while indulged in actual sex on stage, according to agent Lennox Morsely. The Great Purple One decided it’s time to just do it after years of fan mail telling him his stage show was ‘just too nuanced.’
“I guess the American public just wants that sort of stuff from me,” Prince announced in a formal written statement read at the press conference called by his record label last Wednesday. The press release bore the incomprehensible sign that once served as Princes actual name.
Morsely announced the star could not be there in person because he is “just too shy to be there in person.”